Friday, June 10, 2005

It has begun

So, you're staring at your clock. It's time.

"Come on, men," you order as you double check your rounds. You're ready. The gates open. It's thirty minutes until the delivery truck arrives with goods and you have to clear a path of zombies so the truck could safely get in or else he'll simply pass up your compound and go to the next one.

Now, the big question is, you have time for five songs in your iPod (don't worry, batteries are not in short supply. So, what are they?

I'll tell you what's playing in mine. Sure I love Tchaikovsky's 6th, Brahms' 4th, and Bruch's violin concerto as much as the next guy, but that's not zombieslaying music. Neither is Tori Amos (love Little Earthquakes) or Natalie Merchant's Tigerlily (wonderful tour). You need zombieslaying music.

Golden Earring's Twilight Zone. "When the bullet hits the bone, baby!"

Judas Priest's Painkiller. "He is the Painkiller! This is the Painkiller!" Those words go so well with dropping zombies.

Slayer's War Ensemble. Would be perfect if they changed the words to "It's how many zombies I can kill."

Prince's Let's Go Crazy. Why not? Put a little grove into zombieslaying.

And lastly, the Bee Gees' Stayin' Alive. That's the name of the game, friends. It's all about staying alive. Now if a metal band like Faith No More will actually do a funk metal cover of that, that would be da bomb, baby!

25 Comments:

Blogger Jason said...

1. "Serial Thrilla" - Prodigy
2. "Hell's Bells" - AC/DC
3. "Sweet Emotion" - Aerosmith
4. "Rape Me" - Nirvana
5. "I'll Stick Around" - Foo Fighters

6/10/2005 10:19 AM  
Blogger dave said...

hey zombie,

i'm a little confused by your fifth choice. disco? you're supposed to be a metal head. what happened?

but the fact remains, you're still my boy even if you're a closet bee-gees fan.

6/10/2005 11:47 AM  
Blogger The Zombieslayer said...

Dave - Fighting zombies is all about staying alive and keeping as many people as possible away from their bites. It's not about being a superstar. I'm wondering if the Bee Gees knew about the upcoming zombie plague and wrote that song about it.
You play bass. YOu have to admit, that's a cool bass riff, right?

6/10/2005 12:04 PM  
Blogger dave said...

ok, you got me there. you're the master zombieslayer so i shouldn't question your judgement regarding song selection. we all know what happened to anakin when he started doubting the decisions of obi-wan...he got his legs cut off and burned by hot lava.

so i humbly stand corrected.

6/10/2005 12:21 PM  
Blogger The Zombieslayer said...

Jason - Anything by Prodigy will be excellent to slay zombies too. Unfortunately for me, whenever I think of Prodigy, I think of my clubbing days when I was the only person who wasn't on either X or coke. Good times.

6/10/2005 2:40 PM  
Blogger Joe said...

Killing-time music...:

Whiplash - Metallica
Hit em up - 2pac
War Ensemble - Slayer
Unsung - Helmet
anything from DJ John Kelly's CD

6/10/2005 2:46 PM  
Blogger Kunaxa said...

In No Particular Order:

1)"Get Up, Stand Up" - Bob Marley

2)"Put Your Hands Where My Eyes Can See" - Busta Rhymes

3)"Putting Up a Resistance" - Beres Hammond

4)"Man Eater" - Hall & Oates (for the hot zombie chics)

5)"Jerk It Out" - Caeser's Palace


Those poor, poor zombies.

6/10/2005 3:00 PM  
Blogger Mokuyobi said...

hmm

1. "Long Road Back From Hell" -Danzig

2. "Personal Jesus" - Marilyn Manson

3. "Sparkle and Shine" - Econoline Crush

4. "The Young Crazed Peeling" -The Distillers

5. "Oi to The World" -No Doubt.

Especially that last one. I can do anything while listening to oi to the world. its just so goddamn happy and upbeat.

6/10/2005 3:56 PM  
Blogger Heather said...

Zombie killing:

1--"Satin In a Coffin" Modest Mouse

2--"American Idiot" Green Day

3--"Awake" Godsmack

4--"Chop Suey" System Of A Down

5--"Dead Bodies Everywhere" Korn

6/10/2005 6:18 PM  
Blogger Ben said...

hmmm
1. "Living Dead Girl"-Rob Zombie
2. "The Beautiful People"-Marlin Manson
3."Lithium"-Nirvana
4."Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap"- AC/DC
5. "In The End"-Linkin Park

6/10/2005 6:54 PM  
Blogger Vest said...

The main authoritarian musical voice should be, the loud resonant mind bending Tchaikovsky's 1812 Overture. This would be more soul destroying than a Scottish piper encouraging an infantry assualt.

6/10/2005 8:43 PM  
Blogger The Zombieslayer said...

Vest - in my book, the 1812 Overture was the first heavy metal piece ever written. I love Tchaikovsky.

Ben - anything by Rob Zombie will be awesome for killing zombies.

Dusty and Ben - I'd probably prefer mobscene by Manson best, but those are good ones too.

Heather - Now Korn would probably be good zombie slaying music because their music has a touch of surrealism to them anyways.

Cultureshocked - Marley for slaying zombies? Hmm...
Busta Rhymes though I could definitely see for slaying zombies.

Joe - I think pretty much anything from the first three Metallica albums would be great for killing zombies. I'd probably choose Creeping Death.

6/11/2005 1:21 AM  
Blogger tshsmom said...

I'm not gonna read everybody else's choices before posting mine.
Keep in mind these are not necessarily favorites, just appropriate Zombie raid music.

ZS, Stayin' Alive and Let's Go Crazy are perfect choices.
In addition, I add:
In America-Charlie Daniels
Hey Honey, I'm Packin' You In-Bryan Adams
Get Off My Cloud-Rolling Stones

6/11/2005 6:23 AM  
Blogger Notta Wallflower said...

My songs change depending on my mood. I'm getting ready for a big move and sort of entering "panic mode", so here's my "must have" list:

1. I Will Survive - Gloria Gaynor
2. Already Gone - Eagles
3. What's Goin On - Marvin Gaye
4. Semi-Charmed Life - 3rd Eye Blind
5. New York State of Mind - Billy Joel

6/11/2005 7:59 AM  
Blogger tshsmom said...

Already Gone is another excellent choice for the situation!

6/11/2005 8:29 AM  
Blogger The Zombieslayer said...

Jen - Gloria Gaynor's lyrics were actually a coded message about surviving after her lover has become a zombie. If she flat out said it, the song would have never sold and the gov't would have had to silence her, because if people knew the truth, there will be civil unrest like you can't believe.

But look at the words -
First I was afraid
I was petrified


And:
And so you're back from outer space
I just walked in to find you here
with that sad look upon your face


Wow, what a strong woman to survive that ordeal and write a song about it. Yes, great zombie slaying music.

Tshsmom - Almost anything by Charlie Daniels would work. That guy's definitely on my cool list. I've always said if he wasn't doing country, he'd be in a heavy metal band.

6/11/2005 9:32 AM  
Blogger Notta Wallflower said...

ZS.. You almost had me with the whole zombie thing and poor Gloria Gaynor- that's how far my head is up my butt lately. :-P

6/11/2005 9:34 AM  
Blogger tshsmom said...

I prefer to call Charlie Daniels "country-rock", cuz I LOATHE country music.

6/11/2005 9:59 AM  
Blogger The Zombieslayer said...

Tshsmom - You're right. Mrs. Zombieslayer corrected me too. Sorry Mr. Daniels.

6/11/2005 10:21 AM  
Blogger Shawn said...

It sort of depends on the onslaught and what I'm armed with...

For wading into the midst of a Zombie horde with a large caliber machine gun and a bunch of grenades, I would probably probably crank up 'Nessum Dorma' as sung by Pavarotti... but I would have to let it get going before striding out to battle. This also would be an excellent choice if there's a powerful Zombie lord to face since it builds to a good climax.

For a mess of garden variety Zombies, I might choose 'Thriller' by MJ. The video did have Zombies in it and I also hate the song, so I would be more likely to speed up the slaying...

For Zombies that come in a spread out force, I would use any 60s surf instumentals... preferably something from Dick Dale, but I wouldn't be too picky.

For a surreal touch, perhaps I would listen to 'The Winner Takes It All' by ABBA or maybe a rauchous Queen tune...

Finally, if I was picking them off one at a time from atop my compound wall, I might cue up 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood...

Let's just say that my supplies are getting in... whatever it takes...

6/11/2005 10:23 AM  
Blogger tshsmom said...

Shawn, Queen's We Will Rock You would set up a nice zombie slaying rythm.

6/11/2005 10:35 AM  
Blogger The Zombieslayer said...

Dick Dale still plays all the time in Santa Barbara. Those 3 years I was there, I'm still kicking myself for not seeing him play.

Pavaratti as a person's an angel. We definitely need to save him from the plague. I don't see him as being a good zombie slayer though, so we'll have to send a rescue squad for him.

As for Queen, we need to invent a time machine and snag Freddie Mercury. It's just not right that he's dead. Queen would have been the band I would have hired to supply the soundtrack for when we're slaying zombies. "Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun. Flash! Ah ah! Saviour of our universe."

6/11/2005 10:39 AM  
Blogger tshsmom said...

Flash Gordon, almost forgot! Yet another addition to our fantasy flicks list. Way to go Zombie!
Besides, Timothy Dalton was sooo hot in this movie!

6/11/2005 10:49 AM  
Blogger Shawn said...

Good call tshsmom... that song would be pretty good Zombie fighting tunage. It reminds me of my middle nephew who started singing it when he was about two... no one knows where he got it from either... clearly he's a born Zombie hunter.

ZS... you're right about saving Pavarotti. He would be helpless out there, but worth saving.

6/11/2005 10:52 AM  
Blogger tshsmom said...

Did anybody see the Cheers episode where somebody was tapping their glass and it evolved into the whole bar singing We Will Rock You?
Hilarious!

6/11/2005 11:09 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home