Wednesday, December 21, 2005

More college majors fun

My wife's buddy is pretty cool. One day, we were talking about laughter. She actually laughs to deal with stress, and it often gets her in trouble because she'll laugh at the worst possible moments. It's how she deals.

I'm kind of like that. I've always run a ridiculously high stress level, so that's why I have to stay physically active. It has nothing to do with staying slim and everything to do with staying alive. If I didn't, I'd have my first stroke in my 40s.

Laughter really is a medicine. You will note that the funniest people are often people who had it tough. Look at comedians, you'll see what I mean.

My jokes often come at people's expenses. They come at my expense, your expense, his expense, her expense, but if they could get us all to laugh, they've done their jobs. So here's a list which I wrote at work while waiting for something huge to compile. These are three of the stuffiest majors in college and not everyone fits the stereotype, but there's definitely a reason for the stereotype. You've probably known an example of each of these people...

Stereotypical Art major

Blue jeans
nice, second hand jacket
pretentious shoes
50s glasses
never smiles (smiling is not cool to an Art major)
the music they listen to sucks
idolizes minorities to the point of parody
loves to pretend they're not from the suburbs
in a bad relationship
has a child out of wedlock

Stereotypical Comp Sci Major

either rail thin or grossly overweight
smells bad
hair hasn't been washed in a week
wouldn't know what to do if they got the opposite sex nekkid
all their white shirts have ink stains
stutters, unless they're talking about computers
speaks one language fluently, but can code in five
has twenty gigs of mp3s, but most of them they'll never listen to
has never seen a live band
can't hold their liquor
would be completely useless without a computer

Stereotypical Business Major

boring as H*ll
casual means "business casual"
gets more babes than a Comp Sci major (not saying much)
owns one or two pop albums, nothing more
spends five times more on suits than social events
elitist about their major, but has no idea how they'll use it when they graduate
vacations are pre-fab packages
when they reply "not much" to how's it going, they really mean it


Blogger Notta Wallflower said...

Hmm...I'm glad my major wasn't any of those. As far as laughing, I'm guilty. Like your wife's buddy, I laugh at the most inappropriate times (usually when people get hurt). It's not always because I think it's funny, but because I get very nervous. Although, I do also think physical humor is funny.... sometimes.

12/21/2005 9:41 AM  
Blogger Sadie Lou said...

Oh gosh, your description of the art major is one of my uncles to a T.

We were discussing movies over dinner one night when my uncle's daughter, who had been away at college, mentioned disliking one of the movies he was raving about. In front of the whole family, my uncle says to her," Is that really your opinion honey or did you just read that somewhere?"
She turned all red and left the table.

He says things like that all the time. He's a teacher and he thinks he's smarter than everyone else. I'm not bitter though. *wink*

12/21/2005 10:26 AM  
Blogger Bearette24 said...

Hmm. I see the art major wearing black. But pretending they're not from the suburbs = on.

Also the business majors have the best luck after they graduate!

My husband's a techie but actually didn't major in CS. He looked around and thought, "I don't want to be with these people." ;)

12/21/2005 10:29 AM  
Blogger Scott said...

The stereotype of the techie, at least in my experience, is only about 50%, maybe even less. Most of my friends straight out of college were very well dressed, well spoken, and mostly didn't like computers except as a means to a living. Myself, I'm no Brad Pitt but I've never had good reason to worry about my love life, except my expectations were too high. In the end it worked out though. Somebody once told me that being a techie was the kiss of death when it came to the love life. I told him to try taking a shower once in a while.

12/21/2005 10:45 AM  
Blogger Miladysa said...

Merry Christmas and all the best for the New Year!

12/21/2005 11:38 AM  
Blogger Joe said...

Having been an art major, I'd have to say, you're totally off. Except the jeans...

We don't wear jackets, we wear coats.
No pretentious shoes, because they'll be ruined with all the paint.
No glasses, we all have 20/20 vision. I suppose some wear them for looks, or you mistook them for music majors.
We are constatnly smiling, due to being perpetually stoned.
The music we listen to does suck... (we listen to Primus,... and a bit of jazz)
We don't idolize "minorities," just non-caucasians.
The suburban-denial, is true.
We aren't in "bad" relationships, just dysfunctional ones.

Children out of wedlock?... really? I hope not.

12/21/2005 12:07 PM  
Blogger Miranda said...

*grin* Now! Do Political Science Majors!

12/21/2005 1:35 PM  
Blogger tshsmom said...

Laughter is the ONLY way to make it through this ridiculous world!

12/21/2005 2:13 PM  
Blogger bsoholic said...

You know what I childishly find absolutely hilarious? Spit takes. If there's a good spit take in a film or show, I will always fall out of my seat laughing so hard. Don't know why, just find them funny!

12/21/2005 2:30 PM  
Blogger Bhakti said...

I was an art major and I was:

Serious about my art, but always laughing.

Came from a marraige that's been together for 44 years.

Listened to Frank Zappa, Patti Smith, and The Ramones.

Loved the fact that I was from the suburbs 'cause I could take the train outta NYC back to the burbs to catch some fresh air.

Uh oh...uh...I had a nice brown, second hand leather jacket ('cause it was cheap, not 'cause it was trendy).

UUmmmm...all of my relationships were from hell.

Yike...uh...I wore black wing-tipped Doc Martins with purple suede tips in the front (for like three years!)

I wore black jeans!!!! :)

I didn't idolize minorities. I idolized my photography instructor. What a crush. What A crush...

I probably would have looked a bit more cool if my glasses WERE from the 50s!!

I rocked. I loved art school. I learned so much there (School of Visual Arts).

I had a roommate in Brooklyn who was the biggest art school snob you could have ever met (because he won a scholarship).

Oh well, funny post. (Note: I don't wear the wing tips anymore, although I still have them in my closet. I don't know why. I just loved those shoes!!)

12/21/2005 6:37 PM  
Blogger The Zombieslayer said...

Notta - Like your wife's buddy, I laugh at the most inappropriate times (usually when people get hurt).

Okay, that's my next post. ;)

Sadie - Your Uncle is soooo art major. A lot of them think they're smarter than everyone else, and if anyone is holier than thou...

Bearette - My husband's a techie but actually didn't major in CS. He looked around and thought, "I don't want to be with these people." ;)


Scott - True. It's probably about 30% that make the stereotype. But 30% is huge, and enough to warrant a stereotype.

Miladysa - You too!

Joe - That was hilarious, especially the not in "bad" relationships, just dysfunctional ones. As for Primus, Primus sucks! Being from the Bay Area, I'm sure you'll get that.

Miranda - I wish I could. I didn't know enough Poli Sci majors. You up for it?

Tshsmom - Laughter is the ONLY way to make it through this ridiculous world!


Bsoholic - Really? I've always found someone falling down for no reason funny.

12/21/2005 6:41 PM  
Blogger The Zombieslayer said...

Bhakti - Like I told Scott, the stereotypical Comp Sci major is probably 30% of them. It's probably around the same percentage with Art majors. Still, that percentage is big enough to make a stereotype stick, because you can always find someone who fits that stereotype.

As for photography teachers, I want to be one of them. They seem to have the coolest jobs, and they get paid to see hot babes nekkid. What a life. :p

12/21/2005 6:45 PM  
Blogger bsoholic said...

Yeah so long as it's a good spit take, that catches you off gaurd. Like if you had a liquid in your mouth in that situation you'd spit it out too. I think my favorite spit take is from the movie "Club Dread". If you've seen that movie, the spit take is farkin' hilarious.

12/21/2005 7:15 PM  
Blogger The Zombieslayer said...

Bsoholic - Never saw that movie but my wife and kid did. I had no idea it had gore in it or else I wouldn't have let my kid see it.

My son though said it had nudity, so he showed me the nudie scenes. yes, I know his father is that shallow. ;)

12/21/2005 7:23 PM  
Blogger Bhakti said...

I lectured at the School of Visual Arts, Pratt, and Cooper Union. Believe me, the nekkid babes in the photos generally aren't too 'hot', in the sense that I picture you imaging them to be.

I would suggest being a photo assistant for a Playboy photographer. My friend Fadi did that for a long time...and he met some interesting women.

BTW--I was just joking about the Art School stereotype. I remember I was in Literature class freshman year and our teacher, John Abrue (I loved this guy!!) said that he thought we (the art students) looked ridiculous because we all dressed the same. We were flabergasted because we all thought we looked like individuals! He said we looked about as 'individual' as all of the suits on Wall Street!!

12/21/2005 7:52 PM  
Blogger Bhakti said...

p.s. Your magazine should arrive in a couple of days. ;)

12/21/2005 7:52 PM  
Blogger The Zombieslayer said...

Bhakti - Awesome. Looking forward to it.

As for women models and photography, almost all women have beautiful areas, and it's the job of the photographers to highlight those. Most women have bad parts too, so the photographer just covers those up. It's really easier than people realize.

I've photographed nudes and understood this. You have to get the right angles. When my friends saw my work, they thought the women were drop dead gorgeous. The thing is they weren't. I just knew which angles worked with the model.

The funny thing is with art nudes, overweight (not obese, but overweight) models rule. If you know what you're doing, you can make them totally shapely and make them gorgeous.

One of the girls in art class modeled for one of the more talented photographers in the art class. She was a complete "Plain Jane," not at all pretty and from a Venus De Milo standpoint, take Venus and add thirty pounds. Yet, the pictures he took made her out to be drop-dead gorgeous because she had a nice shape to her, and he understood how to photograph her body.

As for non-conformists, they all look the same. ;)

12/21/2005 8:08 PM  
Blogger Miranda said...

*cough* Political Science majors are classy dressers...*cough*

No ;) I'm too biased.

12/21/2005 11:52 PM  
Blogger The Zombieslayer said...

Miranda - Heh, I completely forgot you were a Poli Sci major and a daughter of a Professor. That's sexy. We need more women in Poli Sci and History. Geez, you are seriously the first woman I know who majored in Poli Sci.

to this day, I still remember every single woman in my History, and that was over a decade ago. There were more women in Computer Science than in History.

What is it about History and Poli Sci that are so unappealing to women? How come they're like 95% men? I honestly want to know.

12/22/2005 12:16 AM  
Blogger lime said...

lol, funny stereotypes. yep, i know one of each......i went to a state school that was ruled by ed majors though. would love to see your sterotype of that.

12/22/2005 6:55 AM  
Blogger The Zombieslayer said...

Lime - Good idea. That stereotype is one of the worst. :)

12/22/2005 8:35 AM  
Blogger Vest said...

Sadie lou, I will assume that the statement; They Who Can't Do, Teach, Would apply to your nice Uncle. But of course not all Teachers, But then again quite a few.

12/28/2005 8:12 PM  

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