Friday, December 09, 2005

Engineers who are slobs and Him

I stereotype a lot, and my most common victims are musicians and engineers. I've worked as both and still consider myself a musician first. Feeding a family in California on $200 a month isn't easy, that's why I work as a software engineer. Sure, I could have been a studio musician and make a decent living, but you really think I'd want to play guitar on Jessica Simpson's album? I might even have to meet her. Yuck.

So I work as a software engineer, and let me tell you, every stereotype you've ever heard is true. One good thing is I noticed as a group, they're starting to wash their hands more.

My wife and I both have habits of counting weird things. One day, we sat outside a mall and counted people who smiled. We found it's under 3%. Very bad.

I counted the people who washed their hands after going pee pee. We're over 50% now. Yeah! It's funny, because engineers are either anal retentive or huge slobs. There's no in between.

Not only do they wash their hands more now, the last two jobs I worked had garbages right by the door, so you can take the paper towel and open the door with it. It's because people who don't wash their hands just touched the door.


In other news, I bought Him's Dark Light last night. No, I don't think life is painful. I don't think I'm a vampire. I just like Him's music because it's melodic.

Think of Him as The Cure if The Cure was heavy metal. They're huge in Europe, just haven't caught on here in the States yet.

The music would be better if they had more guitar solos. I think there's two or three on the whole album. The melodies are simple, but pretty and they work. If you've had a moment of exhilaration where you think about that special someone who gives you the warm fuzzies, you might like Him. It's music that would fit with Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

Yup, teen age love angst. Nothing deep, nothing worthy of lasting for decades, but I enjoy listening to it. 7 dead zombies

Happy weekend, all! Away from computers I will be, so I'll be back online Monday night. Go Packers!


Blogger Sadie Lou said...

That's a strange name for a band. "Him" It's sort of like 'The Band'
I always thought that was a cop out. Couldn't you be more creative than "The Band"?
3% of people that smile? Horrible. I suspect cell phones are making people less aware of their surroundings and socially 'occupied'. You know what I mean? Not to long ago, when you pass a person on the sidewalk, it was common practice to smile at each other or greet one another, now people are all tied up on their cell phones--they don't even notice you.
I don't have a cell and I like it.

12/09/2005 9:07 AM  
Blogger Saur♥Kraut said...

I will definatly check out Him. As for engineers, you are dead-on. I've had one in my life for a great many years, and he actually fits into both categories at different times. Thankfully he was a relative by marriage only, so it's not genetic.

12/09/2005 9:12 AM  
Blogger The Zombie Lama said...

I heard a track of HIS (sorry, couldn't resist) on Smallville. It was a remake (cover - guess I'm showing my age) of Chris Issaks Wicked Game. Not bad.

12/09/2005 10:28 AM  
Blogger Laura said...

"because engineers are either anal retentive or huge slobs. There's no in between"

Uh, John might buck the trend on this one. He's a man of contradictions. He's compulsive about washing his hands or any tiny speck of something on his silverware (I'm talking so tiny a normal person would flick it off and go about their business), and yet he's also a slob. He leaves dirty dishes laying around (but then they get too dirty to touch), leaves clothes lying everywhere, and don't get me started on his DESK! Then again, I've been meaning to do another Johnnyisms post...

12/09/2005 1:09 PM  
Blogger Bhakti said...

Guitar solos? You are definitely a child of the eighties!!

Do you like Steve Vai?
I love some of his work, but I'm pretty tired of that same 'ol sound.

I still love Zappa.

Who are your favorite guitarists??

p.s. You inspired me to pick up the Harry Potter books again. I read 100 pages of Book 4 last night! ;)

12/09/2005 1:47 PM  
Blogger Scott said...

You should count the number of engineers that flush the toilet. I've done my time at tech companies, and I find that certain groups of people from other countries that shall remain unnamed tend to be less likely to flush or wash their hands. It's no wonder that disease spreads through some of these countries like brush fire.

12/09/2005 2:07 PM  
Blogger Miladysa said...

Never heard of Him - will look out for him/them now.

Probably the 'flu doom' has encouraged more people to wash their hands.

I once played an air guitar solo at a Thin Lizzy concert in 1976 - those were the days :)

12/09/2005 2:40 PM  
Blogger lime said...

a shiver went up my spine at the thought of having to meet jessica simpson, eeww. honestly i am not sure where that ranks compared to touching a door handle someone else touched without washing their hands. both are pretty gross

12/09/2005 3:05 PM  
Blogger Notta Wallflower said...

The most hand washing group I've ever been around is teachers - they get tired of getting all the germs from kids. I'd have to agree with you about engineers - H is pretty anal about cleanliness. He showers twice as much as I do and is always worried about germs. I'm not nearly as careful (unless I'm at work).

12/09/2005 3:28 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

decypher this:
One wulod tihnk wtih all tsih wit taht Searpkahese had been hree to siht, and my feirnd you may not kwon it but the brad was jsut a tloiet peot and tihs my feirnd cloud qeuit be ture cos Searpkahese had an ahslose too
But to lotraavy wtirres wehn tehy die trehe is etceerd in the sky a fintitg tubrite to tiehr wit a memnonut of sliod siht.
Anon 1610 AD, LOL

12/09/2005 4:46 PM  
Blogger neal said...

Engineer stereotypes huh? I used to have to build and wire some stuff that was desinged by electrical/mechanical engineers. EEEGADS! I used to have to twist and contort myself just to get into some of the places they needed a hundered electrical circuits ran. I hated engineers! I used to wish that just once they would have to work on something they designed. Never happened though, always got stuck doing it myself.

12/09/2005 7:11 PM  
Blogger sygyzy said...

H.I.M. rocks.

12/09/2005 9:03 PM  
Blogger Vest said...

Gadzooks it doth seem we hath a re born homer amidst us.

12/09/2005 11:48 PM  
Blogger SME said...

Engineers are a strange breed, indeed. I saw "Titanic" with a couple of engineers; they didn't pay much attention to the movie until there was a brief shot of the engine room. Then they perked right up.

12/10/2005 6:03 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

not clever vest this silly code is not new niether was your smarties joke- igot my poem from a mens rest room tiolet door,

12/10/2005 4:25 PM  
Blogger Bridget Jones said...

3% is really low. Are you sure that you don't live in Ottawa?

Never heard of HIm, but then I"m officially ancient now.

I calculat the percentage of folks in meetings who have blue eyes. Blue eyes are supposed to be recessive, but in every meeting I've ever been to in 24 years, blue eyes dominate.

Is the org I work in recessive (heh heh heh)? Is there some kind of discrimination going on? A blue-eyed mafia?

Discriminating minds want to know...

12/10/2005 5:59 PM  
Blogger Bridget Jones said...

p.s. spent about half my working life with engineers. Zombieslayer, you are soooo right. They're a breed apart, but I like them.

12/10/2005 6:00 PM  
Blogger Bhakti said...

HAHAHAHAHA! I'm trying to picture Miladaysa playing air guitar at a Thin Lizzy concert!! Didn't they sing 'Jail Break'??

12/10/2005 8:33 PM  
Blogger Vest said...

Anonymous. The male part of your origin, was probably procured from the same place as your sick ditty. 'From a toilet door'.

Anonymous there was no need on your part to defile my silly Smarties joke. BTW I suggest you confine your sick doggerel to the mens wash room please. Have a nice xmas.

12/11/2005 4:23 AM  
Blogger Bridget Jones said...

12/11/2005 9:23 AM  
Blogger clothosfate said...

Hmmm, I have never heard if this badn, but I would sure love to hear some of there stuff. I personally have always been a big fan of The Cure, and I do tend to like harder stuff.

I don't know many, if any, engineers but I will trust you on this one ;) And I love to smile!

12/12/2005 7:53 AM  
Blogger bsoholic said...

Hmmm, I'll have to check Him out!

12/12/2005 8:17 AM  
Blogger The Zombieslayer said...

Sadie - "the Band" was supposed to be a backup band for Bob Dylan, right?

Yeah, I can't wait for my 2 year contract to expire so I could take it out and shoot it. I think those things are causing Americans to be more rude.

Saurkraut - Let me know what you think after you check out Him. Yeah, I throw in engineering jokes at least once a month.

ZL - Cool. I actually like Chris Isaac too.

Laura - He's compulsive about washing his hands or any tiny speck of something on his silverware (I'm talking so tiny a normal person would flick it off and go about their business), and yet he's also a slob.

Well, maybe he's two people. ;)
Heh, engineers...

Bhakti - Yup, wish I saw G3 with Vai, Satriani, and Malmsteen.

Zappa, I like more as a person. His music is good, but sometimes too weird, even for me.

As for fav guitarrists, I'm partial to the heavy metal genre, so Randy Rhoads, Yngwie Malmsteen (80s only, can't stand anything he's done since), and Ritchie Blackmore, and Jimi Hendrix for his stage antics.

Scott - Yeah, I've said diseases spread more easily in other countries because although we may be slobs, they're off the charts when it comes to slobbery. One of these days, I should count engineers by country that wash their hands.

Miladysa - Thin Lizzy's cool. Too bad the singer died. They probably had a lot of good albums in them.

Lime - That's a tough question. both are potential diseases waiting to happen.

Notta - Agreed with the teachers thing. They understand how germs spread as well as anyone.

Anon - Not a fan of Shakespeare, huh?

Neal - I used to wish that just once they would have to work on something they designed.

Heh. And they think they can design things better than a focus group. They couldn't possibly more wrong.

Sygyzy - I think it was you who recommended this album.

Vest - My eyesight isn't that bad. ;)

SME - That is sooo engineer. Goobers, the whole lot of them.

Bridget - Funny, of the last bosses I've had, five of seven had blue eyes. Ironically, I didn't like either of the brown eyed ones (both white), but liked all of them with blue eyes.

Bhakti - Sing Jail Break they did. :)

Clothosfate - My fav song by the Cure is Play. It was on the 12" single for High.

Bsoholic - Let me know what you think.

12/12/2005 7:06 PM  

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